#52 Ancestors 2024 Week 5 Influencer: The Case of the Interfering Mother-in-Law

Maria Comegys Boyer, my 4x-great aunt, might be considered an influencer, if one were inclined to be charitable, but she could also be described as the ultimate interfering mother-in-law.

Maria Comegys, the eldest child of Lt. Jesse Comegys and Sarah Everett, was born in Kent County MD in 1778.  Augustine Montgomery Boyer, Maria's future husband, was born in 1772, also in Kent County.  Augustine was a chronic invalid and moved out of Kent County looking to improve his health.  After trying several locations in Pennsylvania and South Carolina, in 1803, he ended up purchasing 1000 acres of land in Tompkins County NY at the town of Caroline, about where the red dot is on the map below, a little south of Ithaca. 

In 1805, Maria and Augustine married at Stroudsburg PA, Maria travelling north and Augustine travelling south for the ceremony. They proceeded to have four children: Mary Amanda (1806), Thomas Montgomery (1807), Augustine Comegys (1808), and Ann Eliza (1812). 

Meanwhile, back in Kent County MD, Maria's sister, Sarah Everett Comegys (my 4x-great grandmother), had married John Wallis in 1803 and had ten children with him, including her daughter, Sophia Brooks Wallis in 1813, who is the object of this story.  In 1835, 22-year-old Sophia was engaged to Albert Maxwell in Kent County, when she went to New York for a visit with her aunt, Maria Comegys Boyer. Sophia was unaware that her aunt had plans for her that didn't involve Mr. Maxwell. Maria had decided that Sophia would be the ideal wife for her eldest son, 28-year-old Thomas. (I have to wonder if Thomas had some kind of problem that made his mother think he couldn’t find a wife for himself?)

So, when letters arrived from her fiancé, Maria made sure that Sophia never saw them. With Maria's encouragement, Sophia became convinced that Albert had forgotten about her and extended her stay in New York to help heal her broken heart. Perhaps her cousin Thomas's charm helped in that process. In any case, Sophia married Thomas that same year and had her first child--Wallis Montgomery Boyer--in 1836. 

Family accounts suggest that Sophia and Thomas's marriage was not a happy one. Although they did have nine children together between 1836 and 1853, only four of the children lived to adulthood, and one of those died of typhoid in his early twenties. Sophia returned to Maryland at least once to visit her family in 1846. She brought her one-year-old son, John Wallis Boyer, with her, who fell ill and died in Maryland and is buried there in the family cemetery.

Maria Comegys Boyer died in 1849 at the age of 70, having finally confessed what she had done.  Sophia later contacted Albert, who was reported to be "distressed" about the deception.  He died childless at the age of 94.  

Sophia and Thomas appeared to live separately a good deal of the time. The 1865 Census of New York shows Sophia as the head of household and Thomas not living there. Her 500-acre farm, valued at $9800, seemed to be thriving, producing hay, wheat, oats, barley, potatoes, and apples, and livestock of cows, pigs, and sheep.

Sophia died in Tompkins County in 1869 at the age of 55. Thomas died a pauper in 1894 at age 86. Both are buried in the Caroline Center Cemetery. 

Sophia's Obituary in the Ithaca Journal: 

Maria Comegys Boyer certainly influenced the course of her son's and her niece's lives, not to mention Albert Maxwell's life, but possibly not for the better. 

(With thanks to Guy Wallis and Elma Fraser Perry, Descendants of Cornelius Comegys in North America.)